Posts Tagged ‘hate


Creamed Chipped Beef (A Rondeau)

Creamed chipped beef- I hate the smell.
There’s no way to prepare it well.
Boil it in a bag and serve on toast:
You’ll render it edible- at most-
But stinking like the fires of hell.

Give me raw oysters on the shell-
Disgusting as far as I can tell-
Or rustle up some ‘possum to roast.
One dish reviled from coast to coast?
Creamed chipped beef.

If my ears begin to swell,
If I start to do backflips and run pell mell,
If I claim to see Banquo’s ghost
Then you can tie me to a post
And feed me- How my papa would kvell! –
Creamed chipped beef.


But I’m Not Fat Freddy

Mom’s cat,
Li’l P, missed her
litterbox- Yes- with pee-
and soaked my shoe. That cat hates me
but why?


Killing Daddy

“Let’s get a bigger stick and kill my daddy.
He hadn’t been real nice to me the last few days.”
Southern Gothic? Sure.
Only I was on the playground
And the instigator of the plot was a dainty three-year-old girl.
I don’t know her daddy.
I hope she was pretending.
In any case, the stick she had wasn’t sharp or very big.
Still, when did patricide become the solution of choice for the problems of the not-yet-in-kindergarten set?
It’s not new; Oedipus did it.
Ditto Lyle and Erik M. but with no excuse.
I recently read a short story in which it was brought on by just too cheery a morning face.
But what would Mama do without the child support check?
Who’d give her a night out with the girls?
What happened to yelling “I hate you”
Or threatening to run away?
I’m sure that I’m old-fashioned,
I just think it should be harder
To find kids so excited to support and assist this little girl in killing her daddy.